Coachella Giveth and She Taketh Away

Well boys and girls, Coachella 2010 is only 10 days away.  For those of you unfamiliar with the event, it’s an amazing three day music festival full of great music, lots of walking, hundred degree heat and excessive boozing.  This will be my fifth Coachella and while some things remain the same, it’s always a different experience for better or for worse.

So, in preparation for what’s going to be another great one, here are some of my highlights and lowlights from years past:

Highlight #1: To this day, my favorite performance from Coachella of all time was watching Arcade Fire in 2005 play on the second stage.  The sun was setting over the mountains, there was a cool breeze in the air and Arcade Fire put on a performance of epic proportions.  To top it all off, two husky guys dressed in lots of leather started making out uncontrollably next to me which was hilarious and the icing on this magical Canadian cake.

Lowlight #1: In 2006, we thought it would be a great idea to rent an RV instead of finding a nice condo with spacious rooms, pool and tennis court access and functioning bathrooms.  In truth, we’d never been more excited for our great adventure, but by the time it was all said and done, we left broken men.  Driving the thing sucked.  I had to drive through all of LA picking people up in this monstrosity and almost got into several accidents on my way to Palm Desert.  Sleeping in the thing sucked.  If one person stayed awake, everyone stayed awake.  Not to mention the fact that the spacious beds they advertised couldn’t accommodate Vern Troyer.  The worst part you ask? The bathroom.  After making a promise to each other not to shit in the RV (rule #1 of RVs from what I came to learn), our idiot friend decided to break the seal, others followed and the rest was history.  A disgusting and disheartening history.

Highlight #2: With our RV days behind us, we decided to team up with some old frat bros from college and get in on a beautiful condo in PGA West last year.  Oh, what a difference a couple of years make.  This place was amazing.  Everyday, we woke up to breakfast burritos being prepared in the kitchen, a cooler full of beer and a refreshing pool (complete with several flotation devices)  to take a dip in.  It’s the only way to do Coachella.  Apparently, the crew has decided to take it up another notch and rent an even doper spot this year, on some straight scarface shit. All I can say is, is let’s rock.

Lowlight #2: One of the toughest things to do at Coachella is manage your level of drunkness.  It’s a long day, definitely more marathon than sprint so you gotta play it smart.  Beers are expensive inside the show (and for some reason they only offer Heineken) so pre-gaming is a must.  Here’s where it gets tricky.  Or at least it did for me.  You want to go in drunk, but you don’t want to take yourself out of the game.  So concerned about spending money last year, I decided to hose a good 12 beers before the show and bring in a water bottle full of Seagram’s Seven whiskey.  Needless to say, I went overboard.  I knew I was drunk when I was going bananas at the Band of Horses show as if I were listening to Tool.  Things started to get fuzzy during MIA when I cashed the remainder of my bottle.  At the tender of age of 28 years old, I was officially the drunkest I had ever been at a concert.  After falling on my face a couple of times (thank god for the grass) and losing my friends in a sea of people, I thought I was done.  Thanks to a couple of friends who guided me into the MSTRKRFT tent, I managed to start the long road to recovery that didn’t end until the next morning.  I was so hammered at MSTRKRFT, that I didn’t even realize or remember that John Legend came out and performed Heartbreaker with them.  I mean, I’m a big fan of John Legend and the song as well so it would have been nice to see.  So, anyway, the moral of the story is that while pre-gaming for Coachella is a must, remembering the show is also a plus so you gotta find your balance.

We’ll be taking lots of pics and videos at Coachella so check back in a couple of weeks to find out if I’ve learned from any of my lessons.

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